BORED! really hate to see everyone so busy with their own stuff and yet i have nothing concrete to do. *sigh* not that i wish to be busy but i'm running out of websites (related to mobile) to surf everyday. sick and tired of acting busy. juz as i was typing the last sentence, i got myself a small task. *sniggers* pretty excited with my new job scope but yet at the same time worried. though everything is juz as i expected them to be, i'm afraid i wouldn't be able to perform up to standard. i'll be on my own in less than 2 weeks time. praying hard for myself that everything will run smoothly. still anticipating for my new baby to come in. *grins* my little white vios. had trouble applying for the bank loan as i've been with my company for less than 2 years and my previous salary was commission based. hopefully the bid for COE today would be good. gonna be real burdened by this new born but i'm a happy girl. *smiles*

met up with my JC classmates for lunch on saturday. a lot of catching up as i hadn't seen most of them for at least a year. all thanks to my retail hours previously that i couldn't go for most of the gatherings. as usual, many were late and the early birds had our lunch at food republic in wisma. would recommend rojak lovers to try the rojak there. i think it was great. ordered only you tiao for my rojak though and i got a huge portion for 4 bucks. *yum yum* relocated to maestro bistro at cineleisure for dessert. ordered only a lime soda for myself as i desperately need to lose lots of weight. more gossips surfaced during the chit chat session. kinda miss the carefree JC days.

i wanna catch rise of the silver surfer! poor me hafta wait till sunday when darling books out from his ulu camp. *pouts* darling has gone for 12 days of reservist since monday and he's gone outfield for today. i've been video calling him every night and everytime i see him and his silly haircut, i juz wanna laugh. he's been upset with his short hair since saturday but i juz can't help but think that he looks cute. *sniggers* wonder why GV website doesn't reflect the show times for sunday. keeps prompting me that there are no movie sessions listed for this location and i keep getting that for all the locations! is it me or is it the website?

it's been a fruitful saturday. went shopping with darling at marina square. bought 3 pairs of shoes for work from charles and keith. the past week has been quite torturous with my current footwear. i either get blisters on my poor feet or they would be squeezed till they're numb. hopefully the new shoes would be kinder to my feet. *prays hard* darling got me another 2 new tops and a cardigan from those small shops in marina square. silly him insisted on paying for me as i complained that i'm getting poorer. *grins* after the quest in marina, we headed to Suntec. felt bad that darling hafta pay for me and so i tried to refrain myself from looking at anything. however, i juz couldn't resist the temptation. got myself a pair of pants and a pair of skirt from echo. was running late and hence we rushed down to the west to pick up his dad from work. lunch was parmesean cheese pretzel from auntie annes and a you tiao plus curry puff. *yum yum* by the way, i seriously need to lose weight. put on at least 2kg since i was transferred to the HQ. HELP! back to yesterday. headed to darling's home to pass the car to his sister. was feeling lazy and hence we took a bus to the interchange. bought a mushroom and cheese bun and 2 different types of curry buns - my favourite. took a train to jurong point. haven't been there for a long long time. guess the last time i was there was before i moved out of hostel and that's about one year plus back? went TS to search for a nice serial to catch as darling is going for his reservist next week for 10 days and so i'm gonna be left all alone. *sulks* couldn't make up my mind on which serial to buy and hence decided not to spend the money. my eyes juz couldn't stop looking and bought another top plus a cardigan from red2. this time, i paid for the items from my own pocket. *beams* had dinner at the food court. as usual, the place is super packed. after the meal, darling brought me to B1 to do foot reflexology. it really hurts. swear i'm not stepping into such a place in the near future. took a train back and did our rounds at the pasar malam. i'm a glutton, aren't i? got myself 3 potato samosas and darling got himself a chicken wing. it's hard not to put on weight at the rate i'm stuffing food into my stomach. picked up the car and i drove back from darling's place to chomp chomp. it's kinda a routine that we'll go there every night to get dessert for my parents and myself. current craze is strawberry longans. *slurps* really hafta admit that my parking is horrendous. need to perfect it before my car comes in.

sitting in the office as early as eight plus in the morning till noon. set off for a nice lunch with my colleagues before the retail visits. shops that i would visit covers all areas of singapore and it ranges from neighbourhood outlets to operator stores. this has been my routine since last friday. yeaps! i've been promoted to assistant field representative. five day work week, nine to five daily! finally get to enjoy the privileges of going shopping every weekend! fully utilised the previous sunday. went to meet darling for lunch at takashimaya during his break. went to comb the shops on my own after that. bought 4 tops from joop in isetan and that cost me 83 bucks. couldn't resist the temptation of another 2 tops from iora and that made me 78 bucks poorer. total damage done is 161 bucks. i'm a happy ger with a not so happy pocket. *grins* haven't done any real shopping since CNY. it's time for some retail therapy since its the GSS period now. work has been so far so good. the seniors have been nice, giving me good guidance and advice every now and then, especially joyce and ying ying. it's really different from doing sales at the shop front though i have my own clients as well. they're sometimes even more difficult to handle than the consumers and i really hafta be careful of what i say. enjoying eight to five at the moment as i have more time to spend with darling. *smiles* planning to spy on him at the shop every weekend. for the benefit of those who still doesn't know. i've already placed deposit for my vios! hafta wait for the bank to approve my loan and i would be able to get my car by next month! *happiness* wanna get more new shoes and new clothes for work. i'm so gonna be tired of what i have at the moment. it's never enough i guess. thanks to all those who remembered by birthday. thanks for all the wishes and pressies. =)

that's my nintendo DS from darling, the ice blue one. the pink one belongs to my dad. *beams* loving my DS to bits, so is my dad. he'll take out the game to play after work and it wouldn't leave his hands till it's time for bed. knew he would love it. juz downloaded tetris for him. thanks to kenneth that we'll always get new games. *grins*

that's my Louis Vuitton Wallet in Damier Canvas! darling gave it to me on Sunday. it's a birthday plus anniversary pressie. so sweet. love love. he actually saw the picture on my blog early this year, took the picture and went to the shop to get the wallet for me. the azur stock has juz arrived recently. it was a real surprise. i'm a happy and contented girl!

i've been attacked by the virus, the bug called laziness. *grins* went genting early may with darling. issac's leave wasn't approved as the shop is shorthanded. though we lost money at the casino, darling and i truly enjoyed ourselves. took a few rides at the outdoor and indoor theme parks. guess i'm too old for such thrills. *bleah* planned to go snowland as well but in the end, contributed our admission tickets to the casino. though it was freezing, really wish singapore's weather would be as cooling. didn't find anything worth buying except a few key rings for darling's good friends. the trip was solely for us to rest and relax.

planning to get a car before july, before the GST hike. though i really hafta tighten my belt but it's a must that i get the car. it's my dream right from the beginning. juz that i hafta settle for a much cheaper one now as finance wouldn't allow me to get anything close to my LEXUS! *sigh* but like darling mentioned, it's a good start (hopefully). having mixed feelings. excited but yet worried that i might not be able to cope. nevertheless, i hafta take the 1st step. any suggestions on the car model? deciding between toyota vios or honda fit. am open to other choices as well, especially if it would help me to save cost. *smiles* thanks darling for helping to gather all the information. know you're worried about me on the road, promise i'll be a safety driver and practise more before i get the car. sorry mum and dad that your allowance will hafta be cut as i need to support the car now. looking forward to getting the car.

know i haven been faithfully updating my blog. reason is simple: busi-ness. *grins* busy with having to do stupid reports on a daily basis. busy adapting to changes around me. busy playing games on my DS! busy recovering from my cough. busy collecting doraemon magnets: trying very hard to think of what is needed at home from 7-eleven. busy keeping darling accompany. hardly have time for myself till today. really need a break. planning a short getaway trip early may i suppose. was deciding between genting and cruise. the former is chosen so as to save money. well, i wonder if it's the correct decision. in any case, know i'm gonna enjoy myself as darling's gonna be with me. *smiles* issac will be joining us and will probably be getting brendan along too. it's gonna be fun. DS is so gonna be my best travel mate to genting as it's gonna keep me company throughout the long coach journey. how i wish we could travel by air. really hate long bus journeys. not to worry though. i'm gonna have my DS with me! *laughs* i'm juz so crazy over DS now. and guess what? i've decided not to get a camcorder for my dad but get him a DS instead. main reason: wanna get a good camcorder which is better than what he has at present, but those would definitely range from 1k above. however, considering the fact that he doesn't use it more than 10 times a year, it's not that worth the money. besides, my dad's like a kid. always planting himself in front of the PC to play games after work. so probably he would appreciate owning a DS. i'm a filial daughter, aren't i? already made plans to actually acquire 2 more. 1 for dad for his birthday and 1 for mum for mother's day. they can then play versus. *grins* great idea right? so proud of myself. gotta stop here and go catch some drama on tv. been a long time since i have the luxury to do that. will be back for more updates.

to little nina: been nice working with you the past two months. please take good care of yourself in the new outlet. i'm sure you'll be able to adapt to the new environment in no time. i'll still be a phone call away if you need any help, any kind of help. you'll be badly missed. *hugs*

been a real busy week for me. TUESDAY: my only off day of the week was packed. met gracie for lunch at changing appetite (marina square). the reason why i chose the place was coz all their cheesecakes are at 50% on tuesdays! ordered a pizza for main coz i've been craving for one since god knows when. but guess what? it wasn't available! juz my luck. ended up having pasta again. dessert was great though. an ultimate chocolate cheesecake and a rum raisin cheesecake. *drools* chatted with gracie and almost forgot the time. it's really a headache when you're caught between 2 job offers. ger, go for what you really want. no matter what your decision is, i believe you'll do well. headed down town to pick up darling. went daniel yan to get my dress for dinner and dance. spent more time than expected to choose a suitable dress. i hafta admit that black is boring but elegant. in the end, i chose a off-white short bubble dress. looks pretty cute in it. *laughs* yes, that's what i want. something different from the rest. headed back to darling's place to get the car and went back home to fetch my parents out for dinner. met up with my aunt and family. it's kinda a tradition that we always have a meal to celebrate the january babies (my mum, my aunt and my niece) birthdays. dined at lingzhi vegetarian restaurant at far east square. had steamboat buffet. felt really fat after the meal. sent my parents home and headed to steven's house with darling. played 3 rounds of mahjong with issac, joseph and steven's dad. ducky says that he's tired and didn't wanna play. got his dad to stand in for him. hafta thank my lucky stars that i actually won that night. *grins* all thanks to all the gang and ga i had. WEDNESDAY: company's dinner and dance at padang. weird place to hold a formal function? i certainly shared the same thoughts. in fact, the place is now open to public till 16th April :: Crystal Mirror :: tickets are pretty costly. they serve french cuisine or should i say lousy and cold french cuisine. the perfomances are great and entertaining but that still does not make the tickets worthwhile. loved the settings and ambience. however, it was a little warm that night. they serve nice red wine though. it's a pity that only a minority of the field force team was invited. to be honest, it was one of the worst dinner function i've ever attended. SATURDAY: darling's sis's big day. got up early in the morning. there wasn't much for me to help but i couldn't possibly sleep in when the rest of the family are there in the house. sis wanted to keep everything simple. juz the usual prayers and tea ceremony. took a short nap in the afternoon and headed for buffet dinner at sis's new home in punggol. i swear i'm never ever gonna move there. though the buildings look beautiful from the outside, the flats are really small. plus the place is really secluded and seems pretty unsafe to me, especially in the night. darling sent me home after a short gambling session.

darling gave me a surprise when he turned up at my doorstep at midnight. gave me a bigger surprise with the gift he brought along. yes! i finally got my Nintendo DS Lite! *smiles* got it in ice blue colour as i didn't have a choice. though it's not in pink, i love it all the same. all thanks to darling who used his motor rewards to redeem the DS for me, sacrificed his PSP. *big big hug* my darling's forever so sweet. gonna sms kenneth the 1st thing tomorrow to get him help me with the memory card and games. *grins* so exciting.

lOving 7-eleven :: lOving dOraemOn

hate repeating myself but i really HATE stupid customers. if you buy a phone, please DO NOT take it for granted that we hafta transfer your stupid contacts for you. i'm sorry, but it's a SERVICE that i'm doing and NOT OBLIGATION. i've been and i'll be a really nice girl if you had bought the phone from me. would try my best to do a data transfer even if it's very troublesome (like certain samsung models which you hafta copy the contacts one by one). but you hadn't got it from me, or in the worst case scenario, from other shops, DON'T expect me to always be obliging and DON'T ever give me the stupid face when you're rejected. 1stly, if you dunno how to transfer the contacts, ask the sales person who's selling you the phone to do for you, that's the most basic. most common reasons (or excuses): they very busy, queue very long, alot of people, cannot do. so what makes you think i'm very free? i have my own customers to take care of as well. besides, i'm not gonna be responsible if any of your contact numbers go missing. that's beside the point. 2ndly, if you dunno how to use the phone, don't buy! what for buy such a good phone when you don't even know how to do the most basic of all? yes, transferring contacts is the most BASIC? so what if you had gotten the phone from my colleague? was it my fault that contacts weren't transferred? what makes you think i should have helped you? irritating bitch. when i saw you again today, i knew why i wouldn't have helped you in the 1st place (though i can't even remember you at all). yes, that's how INSIGNIFICANT you are. sometimes, if you had gotten me at the correct times (when the shop's not so busy), i would gladly help. bonus for those nice aunties and uncles who need help. i admit that attitude plays a big part too. if you give me lousy attitude, you can FORGET about me giving you good service. trust me, i've NEVER believed that customers are always right and i NEVER will. this phrase has made many consumers in singapore going overboard, complaining over every little thing. SHAME on you!

it's been a bad day for me and for darling too. poor him still stuck at work place. shant elaborate what happened and for your information, he's the reason why i'm still up. as for myself, it wasn't really the customers that have gotten me upset today. customers have been really kind to me. apart from the bitch who turned up in the shop this afternoon, others have been really nice. i should be happy. what brought my day down is probably an incident that happened around evening. think i'm really getting old. memory's failing me. for the past year, i've never committed such a mistake. today have gotta be my 'lucky' day. i'm still puzzled over why it happened and how it could have happened. gotta be more alert from now. *sigh* i'm juz such a scatterbrain. so affected by it though it's not a really big issue.

izzit me? or izzit them? i have no idea. blame it on generation gap? different backgrounds? or the real reason could be i simply cannot stand bimbos? *shrug* i would never have imagined getting more than 20 points for my 'O' levels, let alone say 40 plus. i'm talking about L1R5 not L1R4. pardon me friends, for i know 'O' is such a long time ago. i'm a proud 9 pointer with 6 distinctions. surprised? *laughs* its not that i look down on people who doesn't have good academic results. those grades don't mean anything. for those who know me, you'll know what i mean. i do admire people who didn't do well in school but who are good in character, especially those who are doing well in society as well as at work. you have my respect. but if you aren't intellectual, at least try not to be bimbotic? it's really sickening. i'm not the only one who thinks that you girls behave like bimbos. at least i know it's not a biased statement. maybe it's a wrong word to use as i don't think you are pretty enough to be labelled as one. probably brainless is more appropriate. i don't care if you think i'm fierce or unfriendly, cause your comments don't bother me. i'll be nice to you if you're nice to me. that's my principle. if you find that you don't need me, i don't need you either. don't ever cross my path or tread on my toes. that's my final warning to you.

Valentines Day
received my pressie a few days in advance. darling had sacrificed his lunch break to search for it :: ring from citigems :: *beams* that's my new love now. wearing it everyday but so afraid that i might lose it knowing how unfated i am with rings. i'm still upset over the blink blink that went missing 2 years back. *pouts* i'll take very good care of this purple stone. went to work earlier than usual as darling had promised to bring me out for dinner. he's been tight-lipped about where he's gonna bring me to. *anticipation* it was yet another boring day at work, same old questions and same old problems. juz so sick of it. i'm glad i have darling's dinner date to look forward to. was standing at the door when i saw a girl holding a bouquet of flowers walking in the shop's direction. juz as i was wondering who the flowers were meant for, the girl asked me for catherine. *surprised* happily acknowledged the receipt. lovely red roses. shouldn't have spent the money. but i really love them. *smiles* happiness is the only word when the clock turned 1800. finally time to knock off. the only hiccup of the day was probably the stupid jam. waited almost an hour for darling and when i got onto the car, he still didn't wanna tell me where we're heading. however, as he's unsure of the route, he had no choice but to tell me our destination :: SENTOSA :: due to the heavy traffic, we took about 45 mins to get from tampines to sentosa. by the time we reached the place, we had only an hour left for dinner. nevertheless, i loved the arrangement. had our dinner at sea village restaurant, a restaurant by the sea. though the food wasn't great, i loved the ambience and beautiful scenery. went for a short walk at the rhymes of blooms. need to digest the huge amount of food i took. *grins* the decorations were pretty. the last surprise of the day was the mahjong session that darling had arranged with issac and steven. as brendan couldn't make it, we had joseph to make up the last leg. though we lost in the end, i enjoyed my valentines day with darling. he' s juz so sweet. knowing what i want all the time.

Chinese New Year
had a pre-CNY mahjong session with brendan, issac and steven on the eve of CNY eve. as all of us (minus issac) doesn't have to work on the eve, we played all the way till 8 in the morning. poor issac had to go to work straight after the session. *grins* we're juz so evil. headed back to darling's place for a short rest and went down town to meet my NTU NBS friends at noon. as expected, many couldn't make it at the last minute. had our lunch at orchard cineleisure's pasta mania. 1st topic over lunch was of coz gracie's upcoming wedding next year. others include complaints of work, discussion on future plans and reminiscing the past. really miss those days in school. went to adrian's place for another mahjong session with xuanru after lunch. darling went off to play billard with his friends. been a long time since i stepped into adrian's place. played till around 6 in the evening and adrian sent me home for my reunion dinner. rest of the evening was spent on prayers, watching new year variety on TV and steamboat.
1st day of CNY: went to gu-ma's place to bai-nian. nothing interesting. cousins were asking when i'm getting married and my older nephews are forever trying to get on my nerves by calling me auntie. stayed there for around an hour and headed home to offer prayers. darling came over to fetch us to yew ting cousin's place at holland. nice 2 and 1/2 storey house. love the architecture but somehow, i feel that alot of space were not utilised. spent the whole evening there chit-chatting and munching on goodies. can't imagine how much weight i'm gonna put on. went home with my parents around 8 plus and darling picked me up from home at around 9 plus. lots of changes in plans all cause of steven and finally we set it to be gamble session at his place. started really late (around midnight), all thanks to steven who made us waited for him to leave his other "gamble den" for almost an hour. played blackjack from midnight till 7 in the morning. really amazed by how gambling brings people together. mark, kenneth and me from nokia, darling, issac and carey from singtel and steven (plus girlfriend) from active8. darling and steven were really crazy. placing stakes of up to 400 bucks on every hand. *madness* at one point in time, darling had a deficit of 2.3k. was really quite worried for him. really glad when he broke even and in the end he even won. *smiles* great luck to start the new year. sent the rest of the guys back (except for carey who went off on his own).
2nd day of CNY: slept for a few hours and i had to wake up to go visiting. took a cab down to darling's place. uncle sent me to crescent when i told him to go avenue 2 and ended up having to make a detour. the fare came up to be more than 20 bucks! but nice uncle knew that it was his mistake and ask for only 16. gave him 18 for good luck. stayed at darling's house for a while and we headed to his ah-ma's place. ate lots of cashew nuts (my favourite) and gummies! *fat fat* left the place around 4 and we went to pick up issac to go to steven's chalet at east coast. bought fries from mac to munch and issac got himself a sundae. refrained from getting one for myself as i know i'm so gonna get fat. played a few rounds of blackjack with steven and his colleagues. this time, they were more sane. stakes were kept at a maximum of 30 bucks. left the place around 8 plus with darling and issac to go visiting at huimin's (one of darling's managers) house. met up with the rest of the staff at her place. simply couldn't resist the temptation of those CNY goodies, same goes for darling. *laughs* they told me to keep an eye on him as he has put on alot of weight already. poor boy. kept being picked on for eating non-stop. left the place around 9 plus and we headed back to east coast. packed our dinner from burger king drive through. *yum yum* darling's luck was really good this new year. he won yet again for the night. as darling had to work the next day, we left the place at around 1 in the morning.
3rd day of CNY: rotted at home the whole day. did nothing except watching TV and filling my stomach with goodies. took a short nap and went down town to pick darling up from work. after getting the car from home, we went to jurong east's NTUC to pick up some groceries. headed home and prepared ai xin dinner for darling. *beams* food wasn't fantastic but it's the thought that counts. borrowed que sheng 3 dvd from steven and we caught it that night. wasn't that nice as compared to the previous 2 episodes. time really flies. 4 days of holidays juz passed in the blink of the eye. really dread going back to work but am glad that my 1st day will be at parkway, makes life a little happier.

sometimes i ask myself. what do i really want from the company? promotion? recognition? honestly, if the promotion means little monetary returns (pathetic would be more appropriate) and more shit jobs, i would rather stay at where i am. i'm pretty much happy with what i have right now, getting along well with colleagues from the retail side and on top of that nice bosses. what more can i ask for? not that i would reject a promotion, but i'm looking forward to a higher post than SSC. say i'm greedy, but who's not? i really hate pretenders. people who keeps saying that they do not care about such promotion but their actions prove otherwise. little actions and words to the superior. i hate that. if you really don't care then don't try to earn credits at the expense of others. observation one: claiming all the credits during training, trying hard to prove oneself's capability. obeservation two: hinting to superiors that him/herself should get the recognition award. so what if you had lost out to someone last year due to your sales though you were supposed to get it for your performance? admit it, you're juz not as good. somehow, i juz feel that it's pretty unfair. does it mean that if your superior is more aggressive, you'll be able to get the award? i definitely feel he's not worthy to clinch the title. well, if i'm the one who's gonna take it, there're people who's gonna say the same thing. everyone has got different working environment. how do you judge his performance? by attendance? by what the managers say? for sales, it's a concrete thing. target says everything. but for performance wise, there's always a grey area, what the superior doesn't see or know is not taken into account. so does it mean that if you do enough "performance" during monthly meeting and trainings, you'll get the award? i'm probably too comfortable in the comfort zone that i tend to resist any slight changes, not to mention major changes. what shall my next step be?

mambo jumbo at zouk on CNY eve! i wanna go! it's been a really long time since i've been there. will i be able to make it? i wonder... in a really bad shape now. down with flu, cough and sorethroat. wanna get well before the festive season starts. hopefully i'll get a chance to go clubbing. sometimes i really wonder what the upper management is thinking about. yes, i'm gonna complain about work again. honestly, if you're looking for long term staff, would you hire a bunch of 'O' level grads? at a time like this, i don't think this group of young girls would be satisfied with juz a 'O' level cert. give them half a year, i'm quite sure they'll resign and move on with further studies. what's the point then? waste a huge sum of money to train them, put them through courses and after 6 months they leave. the cycle goes on. i understand that the company is rich but that's not the way to waste resources. even if you wanna to widen the age group of staff, you hafta search for suitable candidates and not juz pick any ah hua or ah lian. in addition, there seems to be double standard towards the new girls. so what if you're on probation? so what if you hadn't got the proper attire? isn't it the norm to get yourself proper attire and not to say that coz you're still on probation and it's okie not to follow the rules? sounds ridiculous? i really wish to see things from the company's point of view. i'm trying hard to. the consolation is, there's 1 out of 3 of the new girls who's positive towards learning and better in attitude. maybe it's generation gap. can't seem to communicate with them. catherine is getting old.

all i want for new year is...

LV Koala Wallet in Damier canvas (Azur) - it's been a long time since i last changed a wallet. guess it was about 4 years ago. really love the koala wallet in damier canvas. very unique. it's a new design. nice nice. gonna get it after chinese new year. *praying hard*

Fujitsu LifeBook S6311 - i should be contented with my IBM ThinkPad. juz can't help but wish to get a Fujitsu. it's juz so sleek and beautiful. plus it has got bluetooth capability which my IBM doesn't and an additional USB port. most importantly, it's much lighter. only about 1.7kg. can't wait to lay my hands on it.

Nintendo DS Lite Coral Pink - been thinking about it since the KL trip. juz wondering when can i afford the time to play. my mum and dad gonna be the ones fighting over it i suppose. *laughs* i don't need it but i guess the colour attracted me, plus the fact that darling will be kept entertained when i'm playing mahjong. should i or should i not?

Papillio Madrid Silk Flowers Pink - bought the madrid folklore rose instead coz the silk flowers pink is twice the price. 130 bucks for a pair of sandals. that's pretty crazy. i'm still thinking about it though. it's really pretty. wanna have a pair of my own. i'm a greedy little girl. anyone wanna place an order? *evil grins*

it's a wednesday night. i'm supposed to be at zouk. supposed to. 6 months ago, you'll never fail to find me at the same place. sometimes i juz wonder if it's all worthwhile. to be honest, i love to club. i really do. juz don't understand why people don't understand my idea of clubbing :: to enjoy the music, dance, have a couple of my favourite drinks and catch up with friends. it's juz that simple. nothing more than that. miss mambo. *sigh* david asked me that day :: what is considered being selfish in a relationship? i believe that all humans are selfish in one way or another, it's juz the degree of selfishness that varies. i admit i'm selfish but there're times when i'll give in. it's true. at times like this, i juz wonder if i'm being taken for granted. i know it's unfair that i'm not speaking up but somehow i need time to think. whenever this happens, i'll juz sink into deep thoughts but after a long night of rest, i'll juz decide to keep the matter aside. that's not very helpful i guess. maybe it's juz me. it's been almost 2 months since i last clubbed. for someone who clubs at least once every week, i suppose 2 months is a record. i know i'm repeating myself but i miss mambo. whispering our goodbyes waiting for the train i was dancing with my baby in summer rain...

feeling grouchy. many many reasons to that. 1stly, darling went to play di with carey, issac and steven. leaving poor baby all alone at home. it's the 3rd consecutive night he's out with the guys. poor poor baby. 2ndly, it's a wednesday night and i'm cooped up at home! i wanna go clubbing! last night i was dreaming i was locked in a prison cell.. 3rdly, work. counting the months, i'm with the company for almost a year (excluding part-time days which were more fun). many many changes, especially in terms of colleagues. good and bad. so many new faces in the company. don't even recognise. still remember my days as a newbie. learned everything through practice. really thankful of people whom i worked with for being so patient. it's not easy. today, i got to know a piece of news which upset me quite a bit. someone's leaving the company for a better offer. really happy for her but at the same time can't help but feel sad. she was the 1st person i got to know in the company. helped me a lot and been through bad times with me. one of the reasons why i managed to convert to full-time. so gonna miss her when she's gone. one less reason for me to stay with the company. work is becoming so routined. answering the same questions every day. why can't everyone be more kind to sales personnel or CSO? we are humans too. we have bad days too. can't expect us to know everything right? juz coz i belong to one company doesn't mean i hafta do everything for you. it's not an obligation, it's a service. have you ever tried to get someone at best denki or harvey norman to repair your faulty plasma tv? if the answer is no, stop asking me to help you service your phone. most hated: you mean you dunno your product? only know how to sell, dunno how to repair. what kind of service? customer service sir/madam. what kind of logic is that? if i sell phone means i must know how to repair? if that's the case, go to your car dealer and ask them fix your car for you. next most hated: same company ma. why can't i leave the phone with you? send it for service for me la. i'm very busy, can't always come down and waste my time le. you're not the only one who's busy lo. if every customer comes to me and ask me send their phone in for service, i no need work liao lo. i'm going mad from all these. really sick of it. i'm in need of a break seriously.

Christmas 2006
spent a homely christmas eve at home with darling. sweety darling bought a delicious log cake from polar. wanted to get from swensens but as expected, log cakes were sold out. lovely christmas tree, yummy log cake, sweety darling and pressies! count down with me to christmas. mum commented that i deliberately put up the tree at home to get more pressies. *laughs* that wasn't my motive but well.. it's a blessing in disguise. been wanting to own a christmas tree that i can call my own. and finally! i get to have one after 24 years. *happiness* thanks to darling for helping to transport the tree back from orchard. even all the decorations on the tree were hand-picked by me. wouldn't bear to tear it down when the season's over. played mahjong at steven's place with brendan, issac and of coz, the host himself on christmas night. it was a night full of fun and laughter. funny guys. enjoyed myself even though i lost in the end. poor darling dozed off while waiting for us to finish. you're juz so sweet.

Happy 2007

decided that it was too crowded to go anywhere for countdown and hence came home to take a good rest only to find that my parents had gone to the community club to countdown with the rest of the neighbourhood. so happening. *grins* went marina south for BBQ and steamboat with my colleagues after work on new year day. apart from past and present parkway staff (Nelson, Agnes, Thomas, Marcus and Alvin), others who were present were the roadshow team (Berlyn, Jeffery and Shawn), from suntec (Desmond) and Eddy (sorry, have no idea which outlet you from). it was another night full of jokes and crap. you can't imagine how nonsensical these people can get. someone tried to hide my sirocco during the night but backfired as i had my name engraved on the back cover. *bleah* the bowling centre was our next stop after supper. agnes, alvin and thomas vs jeffery, nelson and eddy. shawn had a few guest appearances. trust me, there's more fun than you think there could be hanging out with them. left at around 1 plus to join darling, brendan and issac for number ball. if you're wondering, i was watching them not playing. can't play table balls for nuts. had a great night out with the guys. hopefully the rest of this year would be as fun and enjoyable as the 1st day.

miss me? *grins* finally back again. the only reason why i've got the spare time to blog is simply coz i'm on holiday! well.. not that i'm totally elated to go on this trip but it's definitely a getaway from work. if only darling is here with baby. missing darling so much. miss the times we had in bangkok. i wanna go on a trip with darling again! that's only possible next year i suppose. planning another hong kong or bangkok trip. there's basically nothing to buy in KL. prices are pretty similar to singapore. why should i bother then? so disappointing. by the way, if u're wondering where i found the extra leave, i didn't. company's incentive trip. everything paid for. was staying at sunway resort for the past 2 days. realised that i'm too old for theme parks. can hardly take the excitement. was quite fun though during team building. my team actually came in 1st and each of us won a 80 bucks takashimaya voucher! yay! to add to my happiness, i won a total of RM249 during the mahjong sessions for the 1st 2 nights. basically, the new specs i made is free. hee! i'm simply evil. now i have excess ringgit in my wallet. need to spend them all by tonight. or maybe i'll juz play mahjong again. *grins* got a nice view out of my room in marriot. can see the twin towers. wanna go shopping! tik i need to get new pants for work. *sigh* was discussing about future plans with my fellow colleagues over lunch. guess i'm gonna start looking for a new job soon. though i'm pretty happy with what i'm doing now, i can't stay on in this position forever. wanna get out of sales/telco line. it's pretty tiring. and it's really a bad idea for me to stay on in telco. i'm juz so affected by the promotions. *laughs* got a Nokia 6233 for my dad and a pink Nokia 7390 for my mum. Singtel's promotions were simply irresistable. wanted to get a Sony Ericsson W850i too. decided against the idea coz i simply have too many mobiles! still remember my 1st mobile :: Nokia 6110. birthday pressie from dad. next is one of my favourites as it has a blue screen :: Nokia 8250. upgraded to my 1st coloured screen mobile :: Nokia 6100. got myself a pretty phone, my all-time favourite as well :: Nokia 7270. now, my new love would be Nokia 8800 Sirocco! hee. phones i've used for the past year is probably more than what i own. my 1st mobile from Nokia :: N90. followed by N70, N91, N80, N73, N93, Nokia 5300 and the latest would be N73 Music Edition. it's time for dinner! gotta go. will be back soon. =)

growing cobwebs in here. isn't it? *giggles* been really tied up with work. guess age is catching up fast on me. gets tired real easily nowadays. routined work is making catherine a boring girl. went for a nokia event early this month. realised how much i miss working for events and road shows. feel so cooped up in the shop everyday. i shouldn't be complaining since i'm rotating between 2 outlets. but i juz can't help it. seeing the same old people everyday. thankful to all my nice nice colleagues. sometimes i juz don't understand why people (not customers) juz can't open their mouth and ask when they don't have the answers. they hafta pretend to be smart alecs. *sigh*

have not been signing my attendance at zouk for some time. can't afford to club every week. old people need more rest. *laughs* i'll still be back once in a while though. *winks* cutting down on mahjong as well. adrian was out of town for almost 2 months. and now, the kids are having their exams soon. plus xuanru hafta accompany his girlfriend over the weekend. no time, no players.

working for nokia does have certain benefits. one of which is having demo phones, lots of demo phones. beginning to lose the happiness when i receive a new phone. it's juz like part and parcel of my life. i no longer hafta wait for 21 months before i get a new toy. *grins* however, some of you may know. i juz recently spent my "entire life savings" on my new love ::Nokia 8800 Sirocco Edition:: fell in love with it as soon as i saw the image online. a pretty basic phone with not many functions but nice to hold and touch. it's lovely! make a guess which colour i got? the images are taken with the dummy handsets i got in the shop. looks real don't they?

so wanna take a break again. feel like travelling. for your information, i went to hong kong with susan and bangkok with my darling in july. that explains why i can't go on anymore trips. i simply do not have any more annual leave to clear. plus the fact that i'm pretty broke and my target for the last quarter of this year are screaming at me. i can't afford to go on another holiday this year! *sobs* guess i juz hafta be good and wait till 2007.

poor me hafta go to work already. will try to keep my blog updated.

juz read a good friend's blog. hope you're feeling better and hope things at home are better. don't worry too much ya. things probably aren't as bad as you imagine. i've been through it and i've imagined the worst. in the end, it was juz false alarm. juz remember you'll always have your good friends (like me!) around you. sister, believe in the fortune teller. life's gonna better after this year and i'm sure you can pull through. long time never go ktv. muz jio me out one of these days ya. was really glad to see you on wednesday. sorry that i didn't dance with you at the podium. you should know the reason i suppose. though it's long over i juz wanna steer clear of his path.

met up with an old friend for dinner. the same old friend i met in january. it's juz amazing how we click. no other intentions. we're juz good friends. bad times i suppose. juz like me. really need a break. kinda upset that my trip with susan's postponed to july. he suggested going bangkok or was it me? *shrug* but we both need a short trip juz to relax. and guess when's our flight? next week! he's starting his masters in june so we have only next week. now i juz hafta confirm my leave application. feeling excited but unsure. i know the trip would do me good. shopping always makes me feel better. but there're much more things that i hafta consider.
1. BUDGET - going hongkong in july. hafta save up enough for the trip as well. i wanna go disneyland badly! additional holiday gonna burn my pocket.
2. WORK - getting bored of my routined working life. need something exciting to make myself happier. can't help but feel bad having to take leave now and again in july.
3. sOmeOne - of coz you wouldn't mind. would you? even if you do, you wouldn't say. you'll say nothing to me.

no replies yet again. i shouldn't be letting this drag on. should i? it's no good to leave things hanging. but well, you did make it clear to ask me to let go. telling myself and people around that i will if i find someone better. how do you define better? that's my question. till now, i've not met anyone that fits the bill better than you do. am i juz refusing to accept others or am i juz blindly liking you or are you really the best for me? people ask, why him? time and again i tried to find the answer but i juz couldn't. if there's a reason, it wouldn't be love anymore. *sigh* it's a silly question but i still want a silly answer from you. will you be upset if i were to marry someone else? juz wondering if you'll be upset if i were to be gone juz like the previous time but i suppose if i do, i'll never be back again. never will.

you wouldn't believe what i did today. *grins* MOVIE MARATHON! was a great and fun day! been a long time since i actually caught more than one movie in a day. wondering who was my "partner in crime"? who else but susan! our 1st show was Poseidon. reminds me of the show titanic. that's how i felt when i saw the trailer some time back. my mum actually asked if it was the sequel to the latter. after finishing the show, it further confirmed my feelings juz that there were more action and much less romance. a rather nice show. as promised, we watched Mission Impossible 3. i've never thought tom cruise was cute till this show. i wonder why. maybe it's the show or maybe it's juz me. my 2nd time catching the show but i still enjoyed myself throughout. it's probably the storyline that attracted me. When Stranger Calls wasn't scary in the scary sense. argh! dunno how to describe the feeling. anxiety is not the word either. from the beginning to end, i could feel my heart race. and the show got me so paranoid that i didn't wanna take the lift with 2 strangers back at my place. walked all the way to the other end of my block to take the lift up. wanted to call you at that moment. scrolled to your name but didn't dial the number. my guess was you were probably too busy to entertain my silly phonecall. *sigh* disappointment of the day was probably dinner. went sakae at citylink. apparently, they had a different menu. many of my favourites weren't served. *sulks* decided to make up for the lousy dinner by going to swensens for dessert. banana crumble, deep fried mushroom and fries. *yummy* that was much better. time to sleep but still missing you. will you call tonight?

feeling like a pig and eating like one. i'm supposed to be losing weight! face getting rounder. can hardly see the edges of the square. *pouts* been skipping my breakfast and lunch during work hoping to get rid of the fats. but it's really hard if i continue to feast like this for dinner. met susan for dinner in town after work on saturday. sorry for the long wait but i'm still trying to figure out why customers like to walk in only when i'm about to knock off. decided on NYDC coz we're both missing porky's salad! guess it's been a really long time since we dined there. god knows when they changed their menu and took out porky's salad! what a disppointment. wonder if the disappointment got into susan's head or was it her nature? told me she wanted mushroom and ham but ended up ordering three amigos. was thinking to myself that she changed her mind really fast. but when our food was served, she realised she placed the wrong order! *slaps forehead*
Dinner Menu:
- Garlic Toast with Mozeralla
- Three Amigos Baked Rice (for susan)
- Mushroom Madness Pizza (for me)
we were offered free dessert at NYDC by susan's SR senior who was working there. but i decided to forgo that and move on to cartel for dessert. *grins* have i really not been dining out for a long time? so not used to their new system of ordering and billing. i seriously believe they are over-staffed but still inefficient. nevertheless, i still enjoyed the food.
Dessert Menu:
- Strawberry Milkshake (for susan)
- Eastside Brownie Stack (for me)
- Potato Wedges

seems like we can't stop once we start. went chomp chomp with susan after i knocked off last night. been some time since i visited the place. wanted to go amk for my favourite carrot cake. decided that chomp chomp has got more choices. *laughs* my diet is not gonna work at the rate i'm eating. i'm so gonna grow fat! help!
Dinner Menu:
- Carrot Cake (both black and white *extra large*)
- Fried Oyster (for susan only)
- Chwee Kuey (6 pieces)
- Sugar Cane Juice (one large glass for each of us)
seeing all the food remind us of our JB trip some time back. the amount we ate was truly amazing. really miss the fruit juice there. especially my favourite honeydew! it was probably the company that made the trip so fun. shopping and eating. so missing those times.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~7th July 2007~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

i wanna get married! met up with gracie on tue and wonder what sparked off the discussion. whether i'm afraid of being left on the shelf or izzit the ringing wedding bells that got me crazy but i really wanna get married! the question now is: who shall i marry? *laughs* seriously, i thought to myself. if any one proposes to me within this year, i'll probably not hesitate to agree. *hint hint* guess it's more of wanting to put on the wedding gown and the desire to have my own kids than anything else. or maybe, i'm juz tired of my current life. geminis get bored easily i suppose. it's time i stop painting beautiful pictures. it's time for me to face reality. it's never gonna happen. i'm really tired. tired of telling myself to give up. tired of believing. juz tired. not meant to be. if it is, things would have developed back then. i thought i had a 2nd chance but seems like i was juz imagining things. *sigh* you told me to give up for the time being. if i want to and can do so, i would have given up. you're forever keeping things from me. sometimes, i juz wish i know more. don't want your problems to affect others. that's your nature but i juz wish i could share. maybe i'm pushing too hard. too agressive. maybe i should have let what's past remain as past. for now, i really wanna get married. can someone please propose?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~mambO~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

been a while since i clubbed. it was fun! can't really remember what happened. confession: i was high. probably that was why it was more fun than usual. met several different groups of friends and the 1st half of the night was spent drinking. was at velvet with susan and friends most of the time. god knows what i drank. but i suppose i downed at least 8 lychee martinis. it's hard to find good drinking kakis nowadays. honestly, i don't remember what songs were spinned. according to sources, i forgot my moves. *laughs* not that i forgot, juz that i was too high i suppose. can't help but i really miss those regular clubbing days. met yin on the way to shell. question: why are you always the only girl with a group of guys? izzit safe? strange but i suddenly feel like going back to being a les. fine. super no link but that's juz a thought. you told me not to drink so much in future. but why didn't you ask why i drank so much? guess there wasn't a concrete reason. juz felt like drinking. it's good to relieve stress this way once in a while.

叶子的离去是风的追求还是树的不挽留？这句话对我而言可说是刻骨铭心。那时的我曾想过。我已尽全力去留住他，但他始终决定离开。这也就是所谓风的追求吧。现在回想起过去，觉得自己还真的很傻。但是，我从没后悔曾经所付出的一切。他说以我的个性来判断，我并不像是那种会眷恋一段过去的感情的女生。但我就是这样。记得在去年的演出里，我有一句台词：如果真相等于受伤害，我宁愿一辈子被隐瞒。这是我在现实生活中常挂在嘴边的话。当时，我真的恨他对我承认事情的真相，证实我的猜测是正确的。经过了这些日子，我终于明白时间真的能冲淡一切。现在的我想起他或是见了面，心已不会痛了。虽然还是不能以平常心来面对，但也没有那种感觉了。不可否认的是他在我生命中留下了一段美好的回忆。

你是否在猜测他是谁？或许这一切对你根本不重要。已经一个多月没见了。你是否也跟我有同样的想念？很抱歉。对你的态度非常差。我知道我的决定令你感到很失望。但我想不出更好的对策。如果唯有离开才能够让我们在一起，我会这么做。或许你会因我的选择而放弃这段感情。若是如此，我也只好认命。我知道这个时期对你很重要。你没有多余的时间去处理其他无关紧要的事。但有时候我真的不知道自己是否在空等，好没安全感。你能告诉我该怎么做吗？