Valentines' Day
wonder how i should start. turned down all dates this year for ME. my family dinner came in as a good excuse to push away all invitations and a good answer to all the queries. i finally felt the burden on me. it all happened too fast. till now, i'm still wondering what's the next step i should take. should i press on to confirm my doubts or should i juz let nature takes its course? fear of the results. really dunno if i can handle everything if something should go wrong. i'm truly worried. guess you're the only one who probably knows what's going on. *sigh* juz praying hard for the best. today also marked the beginning of my career with nokia. as i was telling my bosses, sold myself to nokia and there's no turning back. pretty excited and yet worried. it's gonna be tiring. real tiring. wonder if i'm gonna be able to cope both mentally and physically. but i know ME and my family would keep me motivated. despite being stressed by the shocking news, i went on with my plan 'B'. what does 'B' stands for? uhm... think hard. you should be able to guess. bet you're laughing at me yet again while reading this. well, my 1st attempt at it solely for you. *bleah* should be honoured. a pity plan 'B' was only half executed. *pouts* dinner was ok. not only coz the someone didn't turn up but also due to the fact that someone really close didn't make it as well. guess i don't really fancy steamboat in the 1st place. went party world with a group of friends much later in the evening and i enjoyed myself. been a long time since i sang and the company was great. session ended at 3 and we headed to este. my 2nd visit and i found it to be quite a nice place though not many people would appreciate. went home at 6 and hafta start work at 1230. how interesting!
1st Day of Work
still remember the 1st day as a part time promoter for nokia. was at wisma's nokia shop. felt pretty lost but i know since then that i'm so gonna love this job or rather the nature of it. today, i felt like i'm back to square one. my job scope is pretty much the same and i can't help but feel upset when i commit silly mistakes. guess switching to full time means more responsibility and higher expectations. yes! i'm stressing myself yet again. tomorrow will be a better day i hope.
Lost in Emotions
been bugged by something which i happened to chance upon a few days ago. sadness, disappointment or izzit jealousy that i'm feeling? somehow, i juz feel insecure. it doesn't make the situation better when nothing is done about it even though i mentioned. know i'm juz being silly and childish. but that's truly how i feel. you said you are afraid of being closed and i know the reason why. trying to convince you bit by bit but it doesn't seem to be helping. *sigh* can someone please tell me how to build trust?