I'd rather have bad times with you,

than good times with someone else.

I'd rather be beside you in a storm,

than safe and warm by myself.

I'd rather have hard times together,

than to have it easy apart.

I'd rather have the one who holds my heart...

quoted this from my so-called cousin's testimonial in friendster. could really relate this to my views on relationship. sounds silly but i guess love is blind. or rather, i choose not to see at times. and it's pretty frequent that this happens. met up with the accountancy group this afternoon for lunch. usual updates on our lives as well as gossips of coz. our main concern was who's attached and who's not plus who's gonna be the 1st amongst the group to get married. i believe it comes with age. *sigh* realised that throughout the years in NTU, i actually had a number of relationships (not including flings of coz). some are definitely more memorable than the rest. 1st on the list would be my dear dear -----> tall, smart and sporty. mr nice guy would be a good description of him. he'll go the extra mile for his friends (that's including me but that doesn't make me any different from a friend *pouts*). nevertheless, that was what attracted me to him but perhaps was one of the main causes for our quarrels too. he was my everything (i stopped clubbing for his sake, that was how important he was to me). we spent almost every single day together. it's always the sweetest at the beginning. no doubts we had our little tiffs but we'll eventually compromise (most of the time it was me who gave in *bleah*). as time passes, our differences such as views and lifestyle became an issue which can't be resolved and our tiffs eventually became quarrels. he finally couldn't take it and wanted a break. at that point in time, things had gotten really bad but i still insisted that i rather live life unhappily with him than to be without him. that's what love can do, makes one dumber. it took me more than a year to heal the wound and ease the pain. when i finally did get over in a way, little did i realise that i had jumped from one hole to another deeper hole. along came HIM. HE touched my heart, really did. i sorta got over dear dear coz of HIM but yet HE chose to break my heart. HE left me, not only once but twice. really hate myself for being dumped twice and being so dumb. till today, he still refuses to give me a reason. i'm really silly when it comes to relationships i guess. it's gotten to a point where i dare not bear anymore hopes in relationships. what's meant to be will be.